Photos from a trip to Ashland, Oregon in January. Feels like a lifetime ago, already.
I have been growing at a pace that is nearly unsustainable. I feel like the U.S.S. Excelsior – hurtling through space to rendezvous with its friends. Shaking.
Risking it all for love. "Fly her apart then."
I'm not growing in the prescribed directions. The cat that is me is out of the bag. Truth is, it's been creeping out to say hi year by year, for a long time now.
I want you to feel good. So, whatever works for you is great, truly. Keep your peace.
But there is a funny thing happening in our culture around the call to 'regulate' oneself. You're supposed to keep it 'manageable.' You're supposed to accept that meaningful change is impossible, that you should give up, that you can't discern between WHICH change you adapt to.
I think this is wrong. I think it's holding us back.
We live in a world that is beautiful, and full of love. It's also totally insane, unfair, reckless with human life, stifling... at times very bleak.
If you aren't freaking out about it sometimes... I think you're denying yourself something important. I think if we could freak out about it together, in an organized way, something might change for the better.
You see, it's about more than self love, for me, now. It's about self trust. I will no longer participate in my own gaslighting in the name of 'making things easier.' I have grown deeply allergic to subtle forms of manipulation. I won't stand by for it. For whom? In the name of what?
It isn't even a choice for me anymore. The cat is out of the bag. Transness taught me that, and I am grateful.
But there are lots of ways to get there.
I'd rather live true and die free than live in a cage of my own making. Nothing has ever made me feel more calm, more grounded.
These images are now available through Ultramarine Photo, my artist-owned licensing library documenting coastal cultures from shore to city (like Ashland). Ultramarine provides values-led organizations with original, curated visual assets that capture environments with a culturally-conscious lens.
Unlike conventional licensing platforms, our collections center the genuine emotion and self-expression of our contributors, providing licensable images that audiences will instinctively recognize as more authentic, leading to deeper connections.
